18w4d

I think it's totally irresponsible for the NP I met with two weeks ago to have said, "You'll feel movement any day now." Especially since that window for feeling movement is so varied.  I have nightmares about having a dead baby inside me and sometimes when I wake up, I'm totally paranoid and wondering if my pregnancy was my imagination.  I know I'm being dramatic, but even though all is going smoothly so far, I'm still really scared deep down.

Other than that, I'm just trying to forge ahead.  Went to a colleague's baby shower the other day.  She was adorably preggo and cleaned up on gifts.  Even though this is #2 for me, with the time that has passed since DS (5+ years -- we have a lot of stuff, but will still need some essentials) and the baby possibly being a different sex, my coworker is already talking about a shower for me.  Really surreal, but twould be really fun.

Also trying to line-up a long-term substitute and and job-share partner for the coming school year.  Have 2 good candidates.  Hope to get things nailed down soon.  I'm a planner.  Haven't quite gotten to the childcare research part yet, want to give it a bit more time... to be even more real (like after my 20 week u/s).

Really excited to work on the nursery... maybe will do a bit of that over Spring Break... and then a lot over summer vacation.

The big date is March 19 in the late afternoon -- my dr better not reschedule on me!  Feeling a combo of excitement with a bit of fear thrown in there...

Positive thoughts, vibes, spirits, etc... How do you guys get yourself to think positively???  SO HARD!

Argh...

I have to say that I'm not thrilled with my ob/gyn.  #1) As some of you may recall, she was really bitchy at my first pre-natal visit.  #2) I've had appointments rescheduled numerous times by their office and with my teacher schedule, that is really impactful.  #3) The latest is that I had my quad screen done over 1.5 weeks ago and I never heard anything about the results.  I had to call them today to find out.  Neg on Quad Screen, Neg on Hep C and Neg on anemia... so that's good, but good God, isn't it standard practice to call a patient and relay lab results?

At this point, while still early, I don't want to change doctors because there aren't that many who practice at the hospital I want to deliver at.  My former doctor (and parent at my school -- weird + not happy with my delivery experience with her) is one of the only other practices.  The only other one shares calls with my current doctor, so there is a chance I'd get her anyway (and -that- would be weird after dumping her).

Otherwise, 17w4d, waiting to feel that movement still, but otherwise, all is well. 

Just had to complain...

17w1d - The Latest

Am in the midst of trying to find someone who will take-over during my maternity leave (they will have to start out the school year, which is rather unique and not as easy as when I had DS and had a 1 month sub and then summer vacation before resuming work in August).  I've already had two people commit and then bail.  Argh!  Definitely need to find someone who is not in search of greener pastures.  After my leave, my hope is to work 3 days/week and job-share with that person.  I just want to get the logistics hammered down so I don't have to deal with them anymore.

Am nervous because I'm not yet feeling movement.  At my dr's appointment last week, I was told that I should feel movement any day now.  Especially since with one's second pregnancy, you're supposed to feel movement sooner than with the first.  Having to wait til the next appointment is so hard... but we've already make a reservation at a nice restaurant in town for date night, to do the "big reveal" for the baby's sex.

Other than that, still have a cough (3 weeks now) and poor DS has it now too.  Still craving fruit, so that helps with constipatory tendencies.  My belly is increasing in size, but seemingly at a reasonable rate.  Clothing is still tricky because I feel like my pants are falling down (and I constantly have to tug at them) with maternity ones and my regular pants are just not possible (as mentioned in my last post).

I did ask why we can't get u/s every week at my last appointment... the dr chuckled and said that while they are fairly certain that u/s are safe, they aren't totally sure and they want to err on the side of  caution.  Party-line/BS or the truth?  Hmmm....

Okay, going to try to hit the hay in a timely manner... exhausted (from sleep deprivation) lately.  Hope you all have a great week!

Cool & Refreshing

16w2d -- while I'm embracing this pregnancy 100%, there are still moments when I wonder if I imagined this all. I'm so very thankful for this "avocado" (according to BabyCenter) in my belly and am very excited for my family's future. Yesterday, had my monthly dr's appointment. Unfortunately, my doctor had to reschedule me twice (because of her sched), so rather than wait any longer to get in, I agreed to see the NP, who is a long-haired, long-skirted, naturally grey-haired hippie.  She was super-cool and gave me an opportunity to ask all the questions I had (all the answers to which I already knew, but it's good to get affirmation). 

My back rash is still annoying, but at this point, not totally intolerable.  Her solutions for my issues (like headache) weren't very aggressive... like aloe vera for rash and ice for my headache... so I'll try to gut it up and see how things go before I ask for anything more powerful.  Also still coughing and peeing.  Boo.

Also this past weekend, I saw an awesome prenatal massage person.  She has a cushion with depressions for your boobs and belly, so you can still lay on your belly.  Side massages aren't the same... And then for the face-up position, she has a back cushion that props you up about 45 degrees.  My ob/gyn says that it's okay to be on my back for up to 20 weeks tho.  When I'm sleeping, I try to favor my left side (not my default sleeping position), but I also do my right and back still. 

My belly is definitely increasing in size, but the feeling is as if I'd just hit some sort of all-you-can-eat buffet.  Apparently, the movement is supposed to happen soon... can't wait.  Maternity pants are a bit big still and my old pants need to be worn w/ a belly band (which I don't love because stuff rides around).  My favorite is elastic sweat pants and PJ pants.  Wish I could wear those to work (we do have PJ days here and there, but it's hardly a regular event).

To address my post title -- I've totally been craving fruit, fruit juice, frozen yogurt and sorbet.  My coworker is convinced that this means I'm having a girl (I did crave hamburgers with DS).  And after eating like a hog and said hamburgers during first trimester, I'm no longer having hog-like, hamburger urges.  My 20 week ultrasound (will find out sex!!) is on March 19... woohoo!

Okay, grocery shopping awaits.  Fruit, fruit juice and fruit popsicles are on the list.

Almost 15 weeks and Still Leaking

15 weeks tomorrow.  Still surreal.  Wish I had a doppler to check things out from time to time, but ah well.  My burning sore throat is gone, yippee, but the coughing and leakage still exist (though less frequently, thankfully).  Now DS is sick with something different -- like a stomach bug.  He's the king of puke... so he's overdosing on cartoons right now, you get whatever you want if you're puking up everything that enters your body.  Hope today will be pukeless.

Haven't taken any belly pics yet, but will probably so do soon.  Meanwhile, this is the most creative and cute video ever.  Also, that mom has got a slammin' bod, which did not seem impacted whatsoever by a baby.  Hmmph!

http://vimeo.com/30039206

This week, I have an ob/gyn appointment (it's been a month since the last one already!!) and I scheduled it during a long planning period in the morning.  Hopefully, the wait time will be zero and I can be back at work in time. 

New symptom -- extreme itchiness on my back, all over.  I'm having a hard time not scratching, but I'm afraid I've drawn blood in numerous places.  I had a bad rash w/ DS too when he was in-utero, it's called PUPPS, but usually on the belly.  Right now, it's not intolerable, but I feel like a wild animal who needs to scratch its back on a tree sometimes...

Not too much to report, not too exciting... hopefully, I can have a productive Saturday today.  Hope you all have a great weekend!

Pissing Myself

Yes, you got that right -- I'm on my third pair of underwear today.  Why???  My strep throat has not improved (was it a false positive?) after my third day on antibiotics and now, I have a horrendous cough that isn't helped by Robitussin DM (on the approved list of drugs) or anything else, really.  And coughing = uncontrollable pee leakage.  And either I've been incontinent all along and didn't really realize it (I know things down there have weakened w/ DS, but this is insane!) or this is a symptom.  Okay, I just checked Dr. Google, and it is indeed.  It does help when I grab myself, but not really a viable solution at work...

Anyway, I got barely any sleep last night because of my cough and I'm really tired of being sick (7 days already).  : (  WTF?  I thought strep was the absence of a cough?  Dr. Google does state individuals with experiences similar to mine, but not a whole lot of other info.  I want to know when my suffering can end.

I'm now 14w1d and I guess this is officially second trimester.  I'd like to feel good like I'm supposed to at this time.  As of today, I'm out to my students and their parents, but not on Facebook (not sure when that'll happen).  Some of my good friends who aren't local don't know yet... but w/ B2, it's not like it warrants a phone call or anything.  Also not everyone knows we went the fertility clinic route.

Hopefully, the next time I post, I'll be feeling better.

I Hate Pharmacies

After several days with the worst sore throat ever, I took matters into my own hands and self-diagnosed with the help of Dr. Google.  A visit to the Walgreens clinic (bec it's the weekend) confirmed that I had strep.  So since I was already at Walgreens, I thought I'd just fill my antibiotic prescription there.  They said they'd call my name when it was ready.  After sitting and waiting for a REALLY long time, I finally went up and asked when it'd be done.  They're like, "Oh it's done."  Then I find out that (I had forgotten as well) that Walgreens no longer works w/ my insurance and I wasn't about to pay full price when I could get the drugs for $5 otherwise.  They said I could go anywhere else and request that it be transferred.  So I went across the street to the grocery store and requested that.  They said an hour.  After an hour, they said we haven't gotten a hold of Walgreens yet.  It'll be 20 more minutes.  Finally, I was like f**k that sh**, I'm going home.  I had the prescription transferred to Costco where DH is going to get some provisions -- let's hope the 3rd time is a charm.  It shouldn't take 5 hours to get a simple prescription filled... AUGHHHH!  I want the drugs so I can start feeling better... but I keep having to wait and I'm sooooo frustrated.

I also hope that DH and DS don't get this from me...

EDIT: Got my drugs!  Just took one and my frown is turning upside down.  Costco dealt with the whole thing in like 30 minutes tops (from the time I called them).  Even though they just put up their closed sign (for lunch) they still processed everything for me.  I'm just going to drive the extra 10 minutes to save the several hours of headache in the future.  Sheesh.